I just aged 5 years

me: i have been homesick lately, which is weird because i know i'd be going CRAZY if i were at home. i had some friends in town this past weekend to go to the mexico/peru game in chicago but everyone couldn't come and it was depressing. i feel old.

Chris: you can't help but love minnesota. and yeah, i feel old too. really old. really really really old...

me: and i know i'm not missing things at home...i've talked to friends there (basically everyone but brenna is there) and they like aren't hanging out. everyone just does their own thing. it's WEIRD. i'm used to everyone spending every second together. i don't waaaaaaaaaant to be this old

Chris: we're in our twenties now. we have adult jobs and have to do adult things and make adultish decisions...

me: and i don't like it. i mean i do like the independence part, duh who doesn't. but the rest of it....not a fan. like having to say bye to people who you may not see again for years. people you actually care about-i suck at good-byes.

Chris: i've found i'm incredibly good at them. i figure i don't want people to be upset because i'm somewhere else, so i'm okay with others being somewhere else. it's selfish to say things like "i wish you were here" and stuff like that. life wouldn't be as much of an adventure

me: that is true.but i definitely still say wish you were here.....especially when i know people aren't happy where they're at and THEY wish they could be somewhere else too...like my best friend at home. her family's crazy and all she wants is to get out. so i don't feel selfish telling her to come here.

Chris: well that's different. i mean when adam leaves or when kevin took off or when wren flew out yesterday. it's not fair to them to say "i miss you where here" because i would never wish i was in madison instead of nigeria or togo or oman... and being sad about it doesn't change a thing so you just gotta roll with it and make your situation as best as possible given the circumstances.you should have your friend sublet here or something

me: she has a job at home and just wants to go back to st. louis....but i want her to come visit. i know togo oman and nigeria are exciting and every time i read ppl's blogs i get this huge pang in my stomach because i feel like i'm missing something....but still, i like it here. i like my friends here and my apartment and the lake and the terrace and the paper and my dock. i might not be changing the world but i still feel like i'm having an experience. i'm going abroad next spring and it will be fabulous. but spending an afternoon drinking on bascom with great friends was pretty fabulous too.

Chris: i know what you mean. i can't wait to get out and about, but you gotta love madison and a summer in madison is next on my list of things to do in life. really i think it's just this goddamn job that has me down all day everydayi feel like the world is passing by and i just sitting here waiting to go and try to catch up each night

me: i agree....with class and my internship and my job, i have entirely full days....i know i'd be bored if i had nothing but i still feel like i haven't been able to have much FUN this summer. and isn't that what summer in madison is about?!? having fun and chilling and being with your friends and not worrying about anything?

Chris: so i was told.

me: as was i. bitches.